I\u2019d like to be the first to admit that I do not welcome feedback. I pretend I do, obviously \u2013 I\u2019m not a psychopath. I know I should want to improve; to iterate my way to nirvana or at least the next tax bracket with a wan accepting smile; maybe even magnanimous gratitude?<\/p>\n
But really, I find it neither comfortable nor useful to receive some quasi-TedX insights into my confected work personality. Even worse, to occasionally have my actual shortcomings lampooned by middle management, giving me ratings out of 10 like I\u2019m on Strictly<\/i>. I\u2019d rather present to the GLA in a \u2018Live Laugh Love\u2019 T-shirt. Boy can I dish it though.<\/p>\n
One of my tutees revealed this week that her practice has stepped up staff reviews to every quarter and is putting them on performance improvement plans \u2013 AKA a \u2018we\u2019re blaming you for your imminent redundancy\u2019 plan. She\u2019s working at one of the acronym-based London culty practices, and has downed the Kool-Aid, fully committed to \u2018uncovering her agency within her role\u2019 and \u2018growing into\u2019 the areas where the business \u2018needs her most\u2019. Maybe doing a Passivhaus qualification or joining a retrofit panel. No, they won\u2019t pay her more. It looks to me like her corporate overlords are shoehorning her effervescent personality into a salaryman-shaped coffin.<\/p>\n
Now she can obviously navigate this herself but if we\u2019re on a call and she\u2019s saying she\u2019s struggling to write her essay about her personal development as an architect, I can\u2019t help but wonder if some of the brain-freeze is caused by this very cynical \u2018feedback\u2019 loop. Once you\u2019re in it, all you can see is how you can best serve the company; how you can help them reach their goals. But that\u2019s the wrong way round, surely? You\u2019re being chivvied into abandoning yourself, and they made you believe it\u2019s your fault. Time to engage my favourite feedback tool: the shit sandwich.<\/p>\n
My timing is off \u2026 I was trying to help but I\u2019m just adding more load<\/p><\/blockquote>\n
\u2018Look, I think it\u2019s great that you\u2019ve taken on board their insights, and you\u2019re so committed to your role,\u2019 I start.<\/p>\n
\u2018Right?! It\u2019s so exciting to be prioritised in such a big company!\u2019<\/p>\n
Oh god. That\u2019s not what it is.<\/p>\n
\u2018I\u2019m sure it feels great!\u2019 I manage before she cuts me off again: \u2018So<\/i> great, while I\u2019m finishing Part 3, and finally getting the UK visa sorted \u2026 and I just moved house!\u2019<\/p>\n
\u2018Wow, fantastic \u2013 so much going on!\u2019 Crikey, this sandwich is just fluffy white bread. I soldier on.<\/p>\n
\u2018Still, I wonder how much is really personal development and how much is them \u2026 setting impossible growth targets that they have no intention of supporting? It seems like a recipe for burnout \u2026\u2019<\/p>\n
Baffled silence. She cocks her head sideways like a pug looking at a treat. Too much filling. Quick, slam a lid on the sandwich.<\/p>\n
\u2018Your focus and responsiveness to this is so great. I wonder what development goals you would set yourself, you know \u2026\u00a0 <\/span>without their input?\u2019 I\u2019ve over-garnished the sandwich. I\u2019ve lost her.<\/p>\n
\u2018It\u2019s such a great question!\u2019 she chirps. I know, I think, and you need to write 5,000 words on it…<\/p>\n
\u2018Well, maybe I\u2019d like to just \u2026 design some buildings? Like, I\u2019m not that bothered about always doing more \u2026 I just want to get on with the job. Haha! You know?\u2019<\/p>\n
I agree and we talk more about peripheral things, some fact checking, some confusion around variations versus valuations. I\u2019m not sure how helpful that really is but if that\u2019s what she wants \u2026<\/p>\n
The next day, I open an email from said tutee. \u2018Hiya! Just wanted to say a quick thank you for the supportive chat yesterday. It really made me think. I don\u2019t have scope right now to step radically out of line at work so I\u2019m going to keep hold of these questions for a more relevant time. I feel super motivated by the process though, thanks again!\u2019<\/p>\n
I\u2019m stunned. You\u2019re right, my timing is off, you\u2019ve got enough going on. I was trying to help but I\u2019m just adding more load. And then I realise. That<\/i> is how you deliver a shit sandwich. Well served madam, well served.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
I\u2019d like to be the first to admit that I do not welcome feedback. I pretend I do, obviously \u2013 I\u2019m not a psychopath. I know I should want to improve; to iterate my way to nirvana or at least the next tax bracket with a wan accepting smile; maybe even magnanimous gratitude? But really, …<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":17071,"featured_media":748638,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_oasis_is_in_workflow":0,"_oasis_original":0,"ep_exclude_from_search":false},"categories":[745],"tags":[76364,72352],"yoast_head":"\n
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